“Only children have a lot of bad luck. I have two brothers and I love them very much. I do everything for them. I am their older sister, they are 10 and 13 years old; Me, 15 years old. When our parents separated, the three of us became much closer, we were in the same basket. Our mother is a reflexologist and our father works in green spaces. We grew up in a house in the country, all together. But five years ago they separated.
I was a little expecting this breakup, because I felt like my mother was cheating on my father. I had guessed it, it was obvious. I had noticed things she was doing, she wasn’t hiding very well… For example, she turned her phone over when I looked at it, she didn’t leave it with my brothers anymore, she had changed her code. He was much less present at home and in our lives in general. When I felt something was wrong, I had nightmares. I asked him: “Aren’t you going to separate?” She said, “No, no,” but I felt like it wasn’t safe. I asked around, found his code to access his phone, found messages from someone he knew. I don’t remember exactly what it said, but I could see that there was affection, that they weren’t messages from friends.
It touched me. Above all, I said to myself: “How am I going to tell my father?” If my mother is in love, it’s none of my business. But my father… I can’t hide it from him, but I can’t tell him either. I didn’t necessarily want them to stay together, but I wanted my mother to be more present. So I didn’t say anything. But I started having pain, especially in my back. My mother took me to the physiotherapist and suggested that there was something psychosomatic going on and that there were things unsaid between her and me. She acted like she didn’t know what he was talking about.
When my father asked me later how the meeting had gone, I told him. He asked me for the code to my mother’s phone. I understood that he knew it. It was after this that they separated.
“The youngest one ended up calling me mom”
Seeing my father very unhappy, I became very angry with my mother. Not for being in love, but for lying to me for a year, for abandoning me. Since she had cheated on my father, I couldn’t be happy for her. For me, her boyfriend was the man who had ruined my life, my father’s and mine. At first our parents alternated in our house. We didn’t move. But since my father didn’t want my mother’s new partner To come to our house, we had to go to his house, with my mother, on the weekends. My mother was much more focused on her love story. My father was trapped in his sadness. So they didn’t serve us. They fed us, they were there in general. But to our sorrow, the books to read in the afternoons to my brothers, who were 5 and 7 years old, the nightmares that the little ones had at night… they could no longer bear it. At night I was the one who went to sleep with him. He ended up calling me mom. The middle one is very sensitive and felt very sorry for my father.
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