Your Eminenz, highly respected Monsignor, dear Pietro Parolin,
As I heard on the Vatican radio, my absolute favorite station, you need a new boss in Rome. And since they obviously head the pope’s election committee, I would like to ask you to seriously consider my statement. First of all, I would like to become one: dad. That is why I want to be honest with you: this application is an internal necessity for me.
Others would say that they had enlightenment, Damascus experience, doubled Pentecostal, vision or the like. I can understand all this and imagine how this can happen. Sometimes you just stand some things, I do the opportunity to do it, and then I hope that it is good. I saw a lot at such moments of internal clarity and external deprivation, but God or at least one of his minions never appeared to me. Or I can’t remember this.
I think this is regrettable, I would have questions for your best boss: where do I come from? Where can I go? Is this still a tariff zone or do I need a ticket for connecting? I am concerned about fear that if I meet God, this will happen in an absolutely unfavorable situation in which I do not expect at all. I can be a little near the lane, because, for example, just died.
Maybe all this can be clarified in advance. Therefore, I prefer to actively look for it as close as possible. Just like his deputy on earth. And I want to be very open and honest: I am also concerned about a social reputation. There are many people who – yes, you should say it is so difficult – you do not think that it is tolerant, but perhaps there is also no, of course, can change something. I would like to remove the details after my meeting. Just wonder, your elevation! You will be amazed.
The position of the pope is naturally poisoned, but no one can seriously deny that this is a great position. After that, there is not much more. In most cases, the office of the leader SPD. But for this I had to become a member of SPD. And that would be too embarrassing for me. Of course, you understand this. You are a Catholic. This is definitely not a wonderful feeling.
To be papal, on the other hand, it would be my thing: you can move a lot in the world, meet interesting people, always talk, sometimes also incomprehensibly rushed, but it is still transmitted on TV, often even live. I would like to do work, even in the winter in the south, a lot happens in the south during the Christmas holidays. Then I would just put on long underpants without a special sense of embarrassment, because under the papal papeli it is definitely quite airy.
In any case, it would be attractive in a particularly step in dad, which, of course, cancels his poncho in the evening and depends on beer and pizza with several friends to watch football or just tell a few pope jokes. You do not know exactly what dad actually does after work. Francis may have stumbled upon his three hundred rooms and therefore looked so exhausted throughout the day.
In any case, I would really like to take on the task and imagine a few funny conclages games: for example, a trip to Heavenly Jerusalem. Or: Who can start the best way? Will you have a pool? If not, this would be one of my first official actions: excavations of the Holy Basin. And I would have crashed into him, until even the thickest cardinal can no longer go down. Well, how will you find it, Monsignor? Isn’t that tempting?
By general recognition, I am a change in career. And I am young, well, well, a little over 50. I know where the sky is, I can distinguish the Bible from the phone book, and I belong to the group of the population that never put dad. I’m not a Catholic! Set the sign, the slogan -monster! The discrimination time is finally over! So why wait? Finally, let white smoke rise from the chimneys of the Sistine Chapel, name: “Habemus Tilum!”, And I will be satisfied.
I look forward to your answer and for sending you my earthly blessing, Ciao Ragazzo! Your devoted Tilo side.